Idiotic statements from Engineers!

[GonzoEngineer]

We have all been there.....some idiot Engineer who thinks he knows everything gets hired at your work and decides to tell management everything that is wrong.

Here are my favorites!

1. "Make everything ribbon cables, because nobody can screw up a ribbon cable"

(the first five ribbon cables he made, four were wrong!)

2. "The Cad software must have a Netlist and so there will be no mistakes on the PCB Layout"
(Yeah, assuming the guy who does the netlist is right!)

3. "It must be a ground loop problem!"
(When an Engineer says it must be a ground loop problem, it really means he doesn't know what the problem is!)

So, what are your favorite dumb Engineer statements?

 

[davelectronic]

Pass that left handed screw driver will you.

 

[(*steve*)]

So, what are your favorite dumb Engineer statements?

"I'm a software Engineer" (That's meant to impress me?)

 

[Raven Luni]

"I'm a software Engineer" (That's meant to impress me?)

I'm one of those

 

[Raven Luni]

As for dumb statements, that would have to be "restart your computer".

 

[(*steve*)]

I'm one of those

Hahahaha

Don't make the mistake of elbowing in on a group of greybeards and saying "I'm a Software Engineer. Let me show you how it's done".

I've seen it once. It was funny.

Let me give you a funny IT quote: "OK, that looks easy."

edit: the "Software Engineer" thing applies to anyone who thinks qualifications trump experience, but is especially evident when a "new" degree comes along.

 

[GonzoEngineer]

I'm one of those

That makes sense.....all the good programmers I know are Raving Lunatics!

 

[BobK]

That makes sense.....all the good programmers I know are Raving Lunatics!

I resemble that remark!

Bob

 

[alfa88]

Not a quote but after watching them troubleshoot a while I plugged it in.

 

[GonzoEngineer]

Not a quote but after watching them troubleshoot a while I plugged it in.

Alfa88, check your PM's!

 

[Raven Luni]

Well its not really a statement but it makes me cringe when americans say 'sodder' instead of 'solder'. The former is what sick people do to Animals

 

[jackorocko]

Well its not really a statement but it makes me cringe when americans say 'sodder' instead of 'solder'. The former is what sick people do to Animals

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/Solder

Maybe because we are not idiots and actually understand pronunciation?

in fairness, I have only one reference, but I am assuming any dictionary will provide the same facts

 

[Raven Luni]

The -l- is still pronounced in Great Britain

...would seem to imply that it was dropped at some point

 

[(*steve*)]

The -l- is still pronounced in Great Britain

I'd go as far as to say that the "L" is only dropped in 1 region (north America).

It seems that the current English pronunciation (as opposed to American/Canadian) came about some time late in the 18th to early 19th century. It is quite possible that the older pronunciation was retained by those new settlers, and not by others that retained a closer link to the POMs. Doesn't explain Canada except by proximity, and there is the suggestion that both pronunciations are heard there.

 

[jackorocko]

Canada has vast influence from overseas. I actually hear it pronounced both ways in the US. But I certainly don't cringe and think of animals when someone says "soder". It actually has a meaning other then slang terminology and as a true blooded american I feel obligated to say it. American english is one of the most muddled languages their is, I so no reason to start fixing it now.

 

[Raven Luni]

But I certainly don't cringe and think of animals when someone says "soder".

That was a tounge in cheek comment

 

[GonzoEngineer]

My Mom was from the UK. No offense meant, but you guy's have some wierd ideas about pronounciation...

This thread reminded me of a funny story I thought I would share.

Years ago, I worked for a company making medical test instruments. The machines had an IBM PC system embedded in them.

My boss was a PHD, and was also an EE Professor at the University of New Mexico.

He told me one day he had a former student who just got her degree, and she was going to start work the next week. He wanted me to supervise her and get her started.

Now, she was a pretty gal, and quite well endowed, if you know what I mean.

The first task I gave her was to check out some Motherboards. We had a test setup using the old (circa 1984) PC type chassis. I showed her what the various connectors were, and told her to try each Motherboard and make sure they powered up.I asked her if she had any questions, and she said rather smugly, "I built my first comuter at home, I know how to do this!"

An hour later, she came to me and told me that the first five boards wouldn't even boot up, and she thought there was something wrong with the power supply. She told me that when she applied power, the power supply would start up, and then immediately shut down.

So I we went over to her bench. I couldn't believe my eyes! She had the bare Motherboard sitting on top of the power supply, shorting everythng out.!

I couldn't help myself, I asked her...."How did you get an EE degree and not know how stupid this is? You don't put a live circuit board on top of a piece of metal! That is the dumbest thing I have ever seen!"

She got real ****y, and stormed away. She went into my bosses office and closed the door.

We couldn't here anything, but we all knew she was screaming.

A few minutes later, my boss came out. He was mad as hell at me.

"How dare you talk to her like that, she has a Degree, and you are just a Technician!"

So I showed him what she was doing, and I told him that whoever gave her a Degree was a bigger idiot than she was! I think I also said something about her getting a degree just because she had big ***'s because she was dumber than a pile of rocks!"

I got fired that day.....because it seems that this hottie was involved with my boss on more than just a "proffessional relationship"

But it turned out OK.....I got a new and better job the next day......and that company went out of business a few months later!

 

[(*steve*)]

Americans are funny people.

They can (and do) root in public, often in large groups.
They are confused about what a fanny is (possibly relevant to this topic).
You ask them for a rubber and they look at you strangely.

Another thing is that an American who has been to many states of their country will consider themselves widely travelled. There is some justification for this though. Every state I've visited has seemed to be a different country.

All completely :-^

 

[(*steve*)]

My boss was a PHD, and was also an EE Professor at the University of New Mexico.

Aaah, UNM. I've spent quite a bit of time there.

I think Albuquerque is one place in the US that I could live. (by one, I mean one of several, not the only one -- I like the US)

 

[GonzoEngineer]

Aaah, UNM. I've spent quite a bit of time there.

I think Albuquerque is one place in the US that I could live. (by one, I mean one of several, not the only one -- I like the US)

I am originally from Albuquerque....all my kids live there.

I am just here in Massachussetts as a Migrant worker.